Always
by DCdreamer55
Summary: I love him even more now, if that's possible, and I'm biting my tough inside my mouth because the physical pain somehow numbs the fact that my heart is breaking right here and now. Based off 7:15am What would happen if James didn't let Snow leave. Snowing


Always

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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><p>"<em>You didn't find him?" Grumpy asked, his voice full of concern.<em>

_Snow shook her head, tears steaming down her face "Worse." she said, voice breaking "I lost him._

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><p>I back up slightly, and the door clicked closed behind me, his head shoots up at the noise.<p>

I love him so much.

He turns around to look at me and I walk slowly towards him, I feel as if I am going to throw up, but I have to do this. For him.

"James." I greet him, and I think this is the first time I have ever called him by his real name.

"Snow." he whispers, with so much hope, and love. His eyes light up and his mouth opens into a huge smile and my heart breaks my heart right there.

I can't do this, I can't do this. I have to do this.

"You came." he whispers in disbelief, as if he wasn't expecting me but is so happy that I'm really here.

I clamp my mouth shut, locking my jaw, because I really want to throw my head back and laugh,_ Of course I came, I love you. _But I can't say that.

I love him even more now, if that's possible, and I'm biting my tough inside my mouth because the physical pain somehow numbs the fact that my heart is breaking right here and now. All I want to do is run forward and jump into his arms, and kiss him with all my might, just once. But I can't, and I takes all my strength just to stay where I am.

"You came!" he repeats, louder this time and runs forward to capture me in his arms, and I grasp him tightly as he lifts me off my feet and spins me around. I clutch him like a lifeline a burry my head in his shoulder, willing away the tears that threaten to fall. I can't do this.

My heart breaks again. I can't help but think how nice it would be to stay here forever, but I can't. I don't let go until he sets me back down on my feet. I wipe the emotions off my face as I pull back to look at him.

He leans in to kiss me, and my breath hitches in my throat, I want this so bad. But we all want what we can't have, and I can't have James. My heart breaks again as I place my hands on his chest and push him away. He was so close.

"Wait, James." I say, and I hope he cant here my heart breaking in my chest, because I can.

"Us," I shake my head, trying to stop my voice from cracking, "it can't happen." And good thing I'm a great actor, because there is no way I would be able to do this without years of lying under my belt. It takes everything I have not to cry, it's just getting harder to keep myself together.

"What's wrong?" he asks " Of course it can, you're here, we can go, we can be together, we can leave all this." he tells me, and I can see a fire of determination in his eyes.

If only he knew how much I wanted to take him up on that offer.

"I know there are costs, but I planned for everything, they can't hurt us." he says, oh yes they can.

"And now that I know you love me to-"

My voice is cold, "I don't."

He searches my eyes for something, anything, but I do the best I can to keep them blank, blinking back tears.

"What?" and the heart-break evident in his voice sends a blow to my chest. Who knew love could hurt this much.

"Love you." my voice catches in my throat, and it comes out as a whisper "I don't." I wish I didn't have to lie to him.

"I'm sorry." I really am, " You said I would always be in your heart, and, that is too cruel a fate. Go live your life, without me, because there is no place for us together."

He is crying, and so am I, the tears pool in my eyes until I can hardly see. A tear falls down his face and I want to wipe it away so badly, but I can't. There are so many things I can't do.

"Go fill your heart with love for someone else, someone who can love you the way I never have." _the way I always will_, and my heart pangs against my chest, squeezing and contracting more and more each second. This is killing me.

"The way I never will." _Always will_.

And my voice finally breaks on the last word, but I don't think he noticed.

I reach out my hand, note inside, and give it to him, the mere brush of his hand against mine sending sparks up my arm. I all past him and towards the door just as the tears begin to fall over my eyelids and down my face. Grief distorts my face into a twisted, ugly mask, I never knew that something could hurt this much.

"Snow."

He calls my name just as I reach the door, my gloved hand stretched out, hovering over the handle. And I'm trying so hard to go but the way his voice breaks as he calls to me makes me freeze where I am.

"Snow." he says again, I don't respond.

I hear his footsteps grow louder as he walks closer to me, closer and closest, I tense, but still don't move. He is right behind me now, his breath heating up my neck, and for some reason, it feels good. He hand reaches out and touches my shoulder. I still don't move, my hand still hovering by the door.

"Snow." it's a whisper this time, and he takes me by the shoulders and spins my around to face him. I look away, closing my eyes, because there is no way I can look into his and not break down.

I try to hide my tears, but the pain is obvious on my face, he knows I'm lying, and I'm sure he knows why too.

"Oh Snow." he says, and you can here the happy realization in his voice, because now he knows I do love him. I always have.

He gathers me in his arms and spins my around, and I hold on tight as my heart reassembles itself in one quick swoop. It flies and flutters in my cheesy because I am finally with the one I love.

"Charming!" I gasp out, laughing

And it doesn't matter that I broke the King's rules, and that he will surely be trying to kill us when he finds out. It doesn't matter that it will be hard, because we are together, and right now, we deserve one moment of happiness.

I pull away from him, and we just stand there for awhile, soaking each other in. His blue eyes are bright and beautiful, brown hair slightly messy, this is the first time tonight that I have really looked at him. He pushes his hand into mine, and then opening it, the crumpled note falls into my open palm. I giggle despite myself.

"Thank you."

I then we both confess, at the same time.

"I love you!"

And our lips crash it's perfect, our first kiss is filled with so much love and passion, I'm surprised we don't burst. His lips fit perfectly with mine, and we move them together in a silent story. It's all the explanation we need. We pull away at the exact same time, both gasping for air, his eyes are full of light and I'm sure my wide smile matches his. And in this moment, everything is fine. Better then fine. Wonderful.

"You found me." he says, smiling

And I can't help but let my smile widen as I whisper back,

"Always."

**A/N: First of all, thanks so much for reading! This is my first OUAT fic, I hope you liked it. Please read and REVIEW, tell me what you think.**


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